A New Day, A New Year (*trail of tears*)

Janauary was named for Janus, the Roman god of two faces, one looking forward and one looking backward.  This should be a time to reflect, but to keep moving forward.

“New Year’s Project” by Further Seems Forever (the best incarnation of the band with Chris Carrabba on vocals) is a powerful song, especially at this time of year.

I wrote the following song a long time ago and under very different circumstances. I’ve associated a lot of songs with a particular month. This one is no different. This is my January song, my new year’s declaration.  The end is hopeful.  The song is very specific to me, but I think you might be able to relate.  Perhaps it might be time to be true to yourself and start mending some relationships.

I might re-record this soon, but for now, enjoy the words.

*trail of tears*
and how can i expect you to know how i feel unless i say it
but i don’t know how
trapping all these feelings inside is numbing my senses
my sensitivity to Christ
i don’t know why but i bury my beliefs in your presence
and seemingly throw it all away

i wish i could translate all my thoughts into words that you’d understand
maybe i could figure myself out….and maybe you’d understand

so i cry a new beginning, finding my way back to God
His hands around me, assuring me i can begin again
i feel so wrong, that what i’ve done can’t be made right
when i look in the mirror, i wanna see You staring right back at me
so i cry a new beginning

a new day, a new year, another chance to be what i’m supposed to be
as tears stream down and as guilt follows
all that’s left is a memory and a lesson learned
and a desire to hear the beautiful sounds of june
(when You rained down and gave me life)